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copy; 2002,2014 Rebellious O'Megan One

          This is the ballad of Dog Punker One
First born (adopted) son of me, Rebellious One
this is the story of a dog called "Dog"

     His mommy was a dolphin
 and his daddy was a gerbil
you know he's full of loving
cause he's a giant fur ball
and all the children love him
(the big kids too)
 but if the truth be shown
the only mother he's known
  is a volkswagen van
driven by a hippy man
      (that's me)
we're his family

He came to me from a red Camaro
             A gift from a god i do believe in
you know he is my favorite hero
cause he's always there when i really need him
he's my best friend
                and i love him

    When he was barely 3 months old
he leaped from van to concrete cold
    and broke his leg in so many places
my girlfriend Dayna, she made sad faces
cause she thought he would croak
                            like a frog!
But i took him to the doctor's lab
    and laid him on the medic slab
where they took out all the broken feces
      and put back in new plastic pieces
and now he's just a...
                  bionic dog!

And you know it never really slowed him down
 cause he loves to run and race through town
chase wild cats   
      pop balloons
  and tree racoons
he's Dog!

From all the people that he's met and knew
     the names he's nicked are quite a few
from Mister Patches,      
to Olympic-Dog-In-Training
        Yes sir-eee!
Cause he loves to run
 and swim          
  and fight        
   and play frisbee
He's Dog!          

With a cute little swagger way down in his butt
       he's a big black and white american mutt
who's been driving by in the fastest lanes
         flying high in the biggest planes
he's the jet set
       super pet
best friend,    
    i've had yet
and i love him! 

From the bottom of Florida's swampy land
          to the top of the Canyon Grand
  swimming in the waters of the Mississippi
climbing the pallisades above New York City
He's even been out in the Atlantic Sea
         travelling everywhere with me

We once went to a party for three kings
       where he did some amazing things
jumped from the roof right into the pool
                     Man! Was that cool!

Oh, he's been wild bitch fucked
and dog fight tested
              tick blood sucked
   and flea infested
he's brave        
 and he's loyal   
  and he's proud  
and when he barks,
  My! is he loud! 
One of those days he started to shiver and shake
              his whole darn body began to quake
the doctor said, "Hmm, let me see...
    Looks like a case of epilepsy!"
I wasn't going to give him no medical drug
   (just sweep them symptons under the rug)
instead i feed him a chicken a day
     keeps those seizures far away!

       When he was barely ten years old
        he was married to a Pookie bold
a little Black Lab with a heart of gold
he's her best friend
                 and she loves him
 She bites and chews on him endlessly
while he sits there taking it quietly 
could it be that he's getting old?
                               or is it love?

You'll notice there's a whole lot of love in this song
                        which can't go on for too long
cause he died when he was a ripe old man
     sleeping peacefully in my hippy van
and that's the end of the tale
                            of the mighty Dog Punker One!

-Rebel One, 1987-2002
 In Memory of Dog, February 14th 1987 - November 26th 2001